Corona Virus Quarantine Day #28: Sheer exhaustion

Corona Virus Quarantine Day #28: Sheer exhaustion: April 15, 2020

No guest writers tonight, just me and my head full of random thoughts…

I’m not sure if it’s a birthday hangover or if the last 28 days has caught up with me but man…it’s 8:24pm and I’m so ready for bed. I have 30 things I need to do but man my bed is looking really enticing.

I think the sheer emotion of yesterday wore me out. I woke up this morning feeling incredibly grateful for my life and for the people I share it with but still overwhelmed by the love I got yesterday. Today we started zoom workouts with the girls of SJA. Basically it’s open to any girl at SJA but it’s geared towards athletes. Since we can’t physically be together we can work out together via zoom. I loved it. I typically work out very early in the morning before anyone gets up. When we aren’t on lock down that’s at 5am. I used to joke that it was the only time each day I was alone. Now…I’m never alone :). It was so nice to work out with other human beings. When I was struggling I could look at the computer screen and see the girls jumping along with me and it pushed me to keep going. Can I say that after I typed that…these are words I’d never thought I’d say? “I looked at the computer screen”. What? Weird times my friends, weird times.

I had class today so those days are always a little more hectic. I laughed with Bryan about how the kids never seen to bust into his work day to have their butts wiped or for questions about how to find something they need for school on the IPAD. Not sure if my kids just don’t take my job that seriously or if it’s just too weird that I’m doing it at home on a computer in my bedroom or maybe it’s because Bryan has a dedicated office space…I’m guessing these are questions we will never likely have the answers to…but they never go to him, always me! Either way, I think the over under on the number of interruptions I had today was over 20. To look on the bright side I guess that’s only 4 per kid…so when you look at it that way it’s not too bad. It’s a good thing my students are understanding and we can all laugh about this later.

After work I had to hit the store. The savages that live in my house eat like animals and we can’t keep fruit or vegetables in our house for very long. Which again, is a good problem to have. They like to eat healthy things and we are both fortunate enough to have jobs and can afford to buy them said healthy things…but holy moly, I’m trying to only do the store once a week and that is pushing it up in here.

Can’t tell you enough how much I detest going to the store. I am a rule follower people and I follow the 6 foot rule and I pay attention to the signs telling me which way I am allowed to go down the aisle. Why am I the only one? And are people getting angry or is it just me? I swear I would smile at everyone I walked past and so few people smiled back. I really worry about the mental health of our nation. I think under the circumstances it’s definitely ok to not be ok…but I think there are a lot of people who aren’t ok and maybe not equipped to manage that. I pray for this problem a lot. It’s one of the unforeseen issues of this pandemic…it’s yet to completely unfold. Something we can all put on our prayer list.

Then…post store run there is the wipe everything down phenomenon that occurs when I arrive home. If there is one thing I am super excited to be done with during this process, it’s this. It isn’t the stay at home order or no large gatherings it’s the no more wiping down all my groceries. Some of you may be wondering why I do that or maybe you think I’m crazy. That’s ok…I live with someone I love a whole lot that cannot get this virus…so I take more precautions than others I suppose. It’s my job to protect her as best I can and I will take whatever precautions necessary to do that.

The kids had a great day doing school, interrupting mommy at work and playing outside. Thanks be to GOD it was so beautiful outside and they spent so much time out there. I could listen to them playing together all day. Their laughter, their genuine love for each other, it’s pretty special. Fletcher told daddy today that a king gave him a special sword to fight zombies and that when he used the sword to kill the bad zombies animals popped out of them. So from something really bad, came something really good. I love his imagination. He may give me grey hair sometimes but he’s got such a pure, sweet and happy heart. Also, his voice. It’s so squeaky and high and I can’t hear it enough. The other kids are so good at playing along with him and pretending that he did in fact kill the zombies and that they can see the animals popping out. Pretty awesome if you ask me.

In a staff meeting we talked about all those in our community who need prayers (and there are many), including two special and incredible people who are either already in hospice or will enter it shortly. Also a former player of mine told me today that her grandma died and they can’t have a funeral…these my friends, are real and serious problems. So complaining about wiping down groceries or having to stay at home for awhile seem like small potatoes and I yelled at myself in the shower today after unloading all the groceries for even complaining about it (if only in my own head) for one second. That’s not to say that whatever “smaller” issue we may be having isn’t important or we aren’t allowed to have bad moments but perspective is everything.

I hope you are all ok. If you aren’t…it’s ok to not be ok. Just know that you aren’t alone. I think to varying degrees everyone I know is right there with you…including me! Know that people are praying for you and that with GOD we can do anything…including the corona virus quarantine.